I’ve just spent a month in a small village in Goa called Morjim, practising Ashtanga yoga. It was a powerful learning experience, and I am thankful to have had the opportunity. The parallels between a fulfilling yoga practice and a powerful coaching journey kept emerging in my reflections. Yoga is an ancient wisdom that reaches back thousands of years. Many of the lessons that come to us from these ancient teachings are relevant to coaching conversations in organisations today. When practised with gentle but dedicated commitment, Ashtanga yoga has the potential to be transformational. Approaching coaching with the same self-compassion and commitment can offer the same rewards. I observed five elements in the yoga practice that I have seen my clients embrace to get the most out of their coaching. They are:
1. Commitment to a goal to create the change you want
The ancient Sanskrit term, yoga sadhana, resonated strongly with coaching for me. The term sadhana comes from the Sanskrit root, sadhu, meaning “go straight to a goal”. In yoga, Samadhi, or ultimate consciousness, is the goal, with many milestones before that. How does this relate to coaching? At the start of a coaching relationship, I ask my clients to imagine a positive future where they are already living the life they want. I offer them a sentence structure grounded in Positive Psychology: "I want to….". The words are important. "I" encourages us to pursue goals for us – consciously checking this is something "I" really want rather than something your mother, husband or boss wants for you. "Want" - this must be heartfelt. Changing behaviour is not easy, so you must be committed to the path you have chosen so that you can overcome the inevitable obstacles as they present themselves. A common barrier is time. No one gives you time. You have to make time. That usually means giving something up. This is a helpful test when considering the coaching goal or outcome you want to achieve. How much do you want it? Are you prepared to give up something to prioritise what you want? Finally, "to" is a call to action. The language invites you to consider what you would like to be doing that is different. This checking and commitment to the overarching goal are important. For the coaching to be successful, you must do the work yourself. Goals in yoga and coaching give us a compass to check our direction of travel.
2. Honest self-reflection
The Ashtanga yoga practice is challenging and demanding and requires honest personal reflection every time you roll out your mat. The practice requires commitment and discipline to work to your fullest capacity each time you practice, recognising that this will be different each day. This translates well into coaching conversations. How can you create the environment so you can show up to your coaching sessions ready to work at your fullest capacity? What would the impact be if you were able to do this? What would happen if you don't? As well as being honest with yourself with your initial goal for coaching, honest reflection is an integral part of every coaching conversation. During sessions, I often check in with clients to ask them what they are noticing or learning from the conversation. I'll also check in to ask about the topic of focus. Sometimes, through the course of a conversation, it becomes clear that another topic is more important. In which case, we pivot. It is helpful to be honest with yourself in your self-reflection at this point of the conversation and go in the direction that gives you the most value. Resistance and obstacles come in many forms. Sometimes these obstacles are outside of us, but my clients more often uncover internal obstacles such as noticing feelings of irritation, frustration, doubt, uncertainty, anxiety, or feeling that are less competent than before. These moments require honest self-reflection and a little courage to explore these feelings with compassion and curiosity. How can you be honest about your feelings? What impact does naming your feelings have? What is possible now that you have named your feelings? How can you show yourself compassion as you experiment and learn?
3. Trust the process
One of the biggest challenges for clients new to coaching is that I am not giving them “the” answer. My coaching practice is founded on a powerful belief: my clients are creative, resourceful and whole. Even though you may doubt yourself, I believe that only you have the right answer for the unique challenge you are facing. I will help you and support you to uncover this, but I believe in your wisdom, capacity, and experience. One of my most profound insights during my time in India is that the yoga practice is already within me; I simply need to do the work to uncover it. My teacher encouraged me to have faith – to believe it is already within me. Coaching requires us to make a similar leap of faith – to trust the process to support us in uncovering the answers we already have inside of us. Suppose we work out the answer ourselves rather than someone telling us the answer. In that case, we feel more ownership, agency and motivation. It also means that we are more likely to remember what we have learned the next time we face a similar challenge. A coaching approach helps build our resources, resilience, agency, and energy. A final gem of wisdom from my inspiring yoga teacher to encourage us to trust the process is if you want to create change and are feeling stuck or overwhelmed, just start, and see what is possible. A micro action can help create a virtuous cycle of action and help to create momentum for your overarching goal.
4. Beginners’ mind/mindset
"In the beginner's mind, there are many possibilities, but in the expert's, there are few". (Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind: Informal Talks on Zen Meditation. Shunrya Suzuki).
This short sentence packs a powerful punch. In the coaching and yoga arenas, we can easily be seduced into thinking there is only one right answer, and our coach or teacher knows it. This (incorrect) assumption can limit our thinking and reduce our chances of learning and growing. The quality I most admire in the influential leaders I have worked with is humility. They are not afraid to admit if they don't know something and are not afraid of learning. They adopt a beginner’s mindset, and it helps them lead effectively and deliver great results. This approach helps in both the practice of yoga and coaching – when we are faced with obstacles, how can we adopt a beginner’s mind to see it from a fresh perspective? What would a friend in a completely different industry or profession ask us? What would they not understand? Using humility, curiosity, and a sense of playfulness can create new solutions and insights. The philosophy of the beginner’s mind is a practical tool for both asana (postures) and conundrums we take to the coaching space.
5. Compassion: be gentle with yourself while you learn
I’ve shared my views on self-compassion in my previous blog on self-care. Like every other human, I am a work in progress and continue cultivating my self-compassion practice. Yoga gave me a helpful reminder. A punishing drive to achieve perfection in the poses got me nowhere fast. While I am learning, a kinder, more compassionate approach has helped me to develop my practice more effectively. Building a sustainable yoga practice is a fundamental goal – this is a lifelong practice. My wise teacher said, "How you approach your practice will make it sustainable. Slow down. You have time". When she said this to me, I felt my stress melt away. I could better access all my wisdom, experience and resources, not just the adrenaline and cortisol created by the pressure I was piling onto myself. So, let's apply this to coaching. If we want something different in our lives, say more confidence or the ability to say no and manage boundaries, we need to experiment with new behaviours. Suppose we expect perfection from ourselves when trying new things. In that case, we will quickly lose motivation when we fail to reach our impossibly high standards. The clients I have worked with that have created sustainable and meaningful change have built a self-compassion practice to their daily or weekly routine. They slow down and give themselves the support they need to persevere.
We've reflected on some powerful parallels between coaching and yoga. We started by exploring yoga sadhana and how this relates to the overarching coaching goal for a coaching partnership. We explored how honest self-reflection is crucial to getting the most out of coaching and yoga. Next, we considered how challenging but necessary it is to trust the process in both disciplines. Then we reflected on how integral the beginner's mind is to maximising learning opportunities. Finally, the importance of compassion as we learn is a powerful aid to the process, be it donning our yoga kit or having a coaching conversation. The ancient wisdom of yoga is still relevant today in the modern workplace and can lead to transformational growth and change.